Onslaught
by Justagirlwithwords
Summary: "A fierce or destructive attack" or in other words, the turmoil Sam feels in 1x09. Eddie Valetik had the uncanny ability to stir things in her she had otherwise kept buried deep, and the onslaught of it all...is rather unnerving. / My add-on to what Sam may be feeling in episode 1x09


**Hey all, so I am absolutely obsessed with Take Two! I've been a silent reader thus far, but Sam and Eddie are just too amazing not to write for. It's been a really long time since I've been inspired like this… This is just an add-on to 1x09. I loved the episode, seeing as it revealed a bit more about Eddie's character. I also couldn't help but feel Sam expressed a lot silently in it, and this is just my take on what she could be feeling.**

 **Hope you like it! xx**

 _Sam_

There was something to be said about emotions. The gushing, overwhelming, dizzying kind of emotions. All those months that she had spent in the haze of alcohol and other suppressants pre-rehab had resulted in her desperate desire to block out such emotions for the sake of her sobriety. Or so, she rationalized.

Working with Eddie was more like any drug than she had previously encountered. When they walked onto the crime scene, unsure as to why they were suddenly called adjacent to a legitimate police investigation, she couldn't help but notice the slight change in his step. He sauntered to the premises with what one could only describe as swagger, seemingly finding comfort in an old routine.

Apprehension and hesitation of any kind seemed to not be present and she reveled in discovering this new side of him. She had met post-cop Eddie. PI with a tortured soul Eddie. Fiercely protective but always holding back Eddie.

She surprised herself, a bit more than the usual circumstances called for, serial killer and all, when she heard the tone the Detective used. His eyes were calculating, cold, and rude. She was surprised that she felt a zing of anger zip through her body like electricity. Like the light in one of those carnival games that required someone to use a mallet to hit as hard as they could to get to the bell at the top. It was instantaneous, it was so strong, it was so sudden, she couldn't help but put her hands in the back of her pockets and watch the scene unfold.

Oh how desperately did she want to unleash her thoughts on this idiotic detective that clearly had no understanding of who Eddie was. The man who fought tooth and nail to find justice for every client. The man who seemed to harbor feelings of affection of all those that he came close to, in an effort to protect his own scarred heart. This man was belittling everything that Eddie did, and he was a PI of astounding merit, both professionally and personally.

Her anger and rage surprised her so much that she didn't even feel the need to supply a feisty quip when the detective mentioned, back-handedly of course, of her true profession.

Sam didn't think that this case would stir something else in her, more than it already had, seeing as the emotional toll was rather taxing in nature. But no, when she freaked out about her likeness to the victims, and when Eddie offered to stay, opening up her home and heart to him became inevitable.

When he spoke about his parents, about why he wanted to be a cop, about some goddamn monster burning down his father's store, she was hit with emotion after emotion, like a group of flying bullets aimed specifically for her. Admiration shone in her eyes, hurt weighed heavy in her heart, for the troubles Eddie's parents had to endure as well as the aftermath of his own honorable actions, and anger pulsated within her, seemingly tingling her nerve ending and sending a surge of electric like energy through her body.

It wasn't fair that he had to sacrifice something so important to him when he made the _right_ call, the _honorable_ call. And what angered her even more? The small part inside of her that was just a little glad that he was no longer a cop, that he was a PI, and that they worked together.

The best thing in her life, in pretty much forever, came at the expense of his loss. Sure, Eddie ran a respectable business, reputable, honest, legitimate. Sure, he made a hell of a PI. But Sam was so sure that twinkle in his eye, gleaming of nostalgia and past pride, no longer existed. She couldn't help but be willing to give up anything in the world to give that back to him. He had given her so much, and here she was tying him down to a life that he didn't need or want. Or so she thought.

 _"_ _Enough with the questions Valetik, you're not a cop anymore."_

That phrase troubled her, she could see, sense, feel, Eddie deflate just a little at that blatant statement, and she was furious.

The onslaught of emotions she suddenly couldn't help but feeling, whenever Eddie was in proximity, or just thought of, unnerved her. And when he gave her the medallion, of the patron saint of cops, calling her his partner in one fell swoop, Sam realized she was a goner.

Her sobriety may be an active effort on the tough days, sure, but the feelings she had when Eddie was around was better than any drug she had ever tried. Her anger simmered, perhaps ready to explode another day, adoration and admiration in it's place.


End file.
